“Rahul, do you believe in miracles?” Bipin asked as we boarded the cab from office. I was expecting this question somehow. I have known him for years now and I know how he interprets and believe in things. For him everything is very black and white but I wish life is that simple. There are many perspectives to everything. Black and white does symbolize honesty and certainty but at the same time can make things so rigid.
For example, earlier in that evening when we went downstairs to grab a coffee we met a person outside the coffee shop. He was looking at me while we were ordering coffee and as we stepped out he followed us and asked me “Can I pray for you, right now?” Not disrespecting or belittling anyone’s beliefs and intentions I gave my consent however I wasn’t sure how he’s going to do that. Anyhow, he came forward, put his hand firmly on my chest and started praying. I couldn’t exactly got his verses/sermons but I could hear a few words and figured he was a Christian and I do know that certain section of Christianity believes that you can heal someone by praying for them. After finishing his prayers he asked me to try getting up from my wheelchair. To that, I laughed actually and declined his request. I thanked him for his good intentions and came back to office. Bipin was with me during all that time and I was sure as hell that he wasn’t happy that I declined that man’s request without even trying once.
I said “Bipin, do I believe in miracles or God? The answer is yes but this is not the way it is supposed to work, at least for the majority. Rigid in our own beliefs we both didn’t budge that day and the cab came to a halt as the home arrived.
‘Do miracles follow faith or faith follow the miracles’ very contrasting argument but trust me both submerge to become one where we gain that awareness and the wisdom to analyse things and situations at a deeper level. There is always a lot beneath the surface. I have seen people taking book ‘The Secret’ as an exact science and expect the results exactly the same as the man in the paragraph above believed that I could walk after his prayers. That’s where we lose track when we start believing blindly and depending a lot on things beyond our control like God, Spirits, Universe, Angels, Energies, etc. Two consequences of believing in all this without understanding are 1) We don’t take actions and think that just by believing or praying will improve our life and 2) Since we start believing so strongly and then we don’t receive the exact outcome we even break further and that eventually takes us farther from the truth.
Recently I was invited by a school for their literature festival to address the kids and to give a pep talk and during my time on stage one of the students from the front row, who otherwise wasn’t looking too engaged raised his hand and asked “Do you believe in miracles, Sir?” I was taken aback by his question because the topic of discussion was totally different it seemed a little odd why he asked this but he surely was seeking an answer. The look on his face was genuine, he was looking at me with so much expectations and I was a little anxious in that moment because this wasn’t something I prepared in my mind to speak. His question reminded me of Bipin’s question a few years back for which I didn’t have a very convincing reply. I took a pause and a deep breath and started again “Well to answer it I will have to tell you a story” to this all the kids started clapping and for a moment I felt like a star… I quickly pulled myself out from that moment of glory and continued “When I was a kid probably much younger than you, I was told that if we pray with utmost honesty, the prayers do come true and as a kid you do see everything just black and white and you take everything at face value. I started praying daily before sleeping and being someone who loves to fantasize I started fantasizing that when I wake up tomorrow I’ll able to walk, play cricket with my friends, do all sorts of that friends shit in school and what not. Every morning I woke up and tried feeling that sensation in my legs to stand and walk but that didn’t happen. Months and years passed praying and trying. In between, I went to many places for treatment for a very miniscule success and also started taking studies more seriously because now that was my last chance with life. I completed studies then did my masters, in between I was teaching as well, found a decent job, recently published my first book as an author ‘Blue Crayons’, along the way made some great friends, some amazing colleagues, teachers, mentors, first and foremost my family who never for a moment or a second have given up on me.
Now look at my prayers to God as a kid and right now here I am in front of you. Is it not a miracle? Miracles may not have an exact face, shape or form you would have expected but they do happen if you believe in them and even more than that believe in yourself and what you’ve got. God/Universe/Meditation will definitely help you, guide you but only if you act. My life story could not be a miracle if my family or I wouldn’t have taken a step in the right direction in the first place. So to answer your question I will say ‘Be your own miracle’.” And with that the claps followed from each corner of the school ground and most importantly that kid now had a confident smile on his face.
On the way coming back home I was more at peace because not just that kid but I, Bipin and that man who prayed for me too got our answers.
